Finding The Balance Between Romance And Kids
Many factors can affect the success of a marriage, one of which is romance. When a lovely couple has been married for a long time already, there is a high tendency that each of them becomes complacent. Sometimes, they become too comfortable in the relationship to the point that they will no longer care about romance. This is wrong because, without romance in a marriage, the marital union is undoubtedly bound to go down the drain.
If you are happily married to your husband, be sure to maintain romance and intimacy in your relationship. Make an effort to become passionate so that both of you would never end up in divorce. Doing this can be challenging especially if you already have kids. It will be difficult on your part to fulfill the duties of being a mother and a wife. Here are some of the things that you could do to make it work:
Set A Date Night
Raising kids can be stressful and exhausting. Give yourself a break by going out on a date with your husband. Now that you already have children, you will realize that casual dinner or movie dates are impossible. What you need to do is to set a date night ahead of time and never cancel it no matter what happens. Do not feel guilty or bad about taking a break from being a mother. Remember that you also have intimacy needs. “Be clear about your needs,” wrote Margarita Tartakovsky, MS. “After you know what your needs are, tell your partner.”
Always Talk Before Sleeping
As a parent, you must learn how to bring your kids to sleep. It is crucial that you impose a bedtime schedule to avoid experiencing stress at night. Once they are asleep soundly, the next thing to do is to bond with your partner. “There’s something about spending together time at the very end of the day that lends itself to closeness,” says Marie Hartwell-Walker, EdD. Be sure to have meaningful conversations before going to sleep. Talk to your husband about all the stories you want to share. At the same time, be sure to ask him about regular updates on his life at work or at home.
Go On A Special Trip
Consider yourself lucky if you get an opportunity to go out of town with your spouse. There are times when you need at least one weekend to rekindle the fire in your marriage. Think of going out of town for a quick beach vacation or camping in the woods. Do the things that your husband enjoys doing. Do not worry as to who will take care of the kids. You can always call your parents to help you with this task. You can also ask a close friend to watch over the children while you are away. “When you make a point of being together, without kids, pets and other interruptions, you will form a bond that will get you through life’s rough spots,” says Maud Purcell, LCSW. CEAP.
Make every moment count in your marriage. Never forget that just because you are already a mother does not mean that you can become complacent in the relationship. Avoid making your husband feel that he is no longer a priority. Take note that he needs your love, affection, and care. Find ways on how to make your partner more involved in your role as a mother. Believe in yourself that you can find the right balance between raising kids and being a good wife.