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Note: For those who haven’t read Part 1, please do so before jumping to this article. Thank you!

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To continue…

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“It’s not that teenagers suddenly discovered the joy of sex. Sexual activity among teens remained stable. What changed was the use of contraception,” Joni E Johnston, PsyD, wrote. That said, teenage males fathering a child also need the involvement of their family. Some may welcome the chance of being a father who has hands-on involvement with their children, while others may feel afraid and guilty, and may need encouragement to face his responsibilities, as, for every state, a father is legally responsible for child support.

Continue reading “Help! My Daughter Is Pregnant! – Part 2”

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A quite controversial topic among families all over the country is the issue of teenage pregnancy. So much taboo and dogmas surround the problem, coming from various sectors and backgrounds, the subject can and will be easily overwhelmed by such. Parents definitely would not expect to be grandparents at such an early stage, and such, may not know how to deal with such a fact.

Continue reading “Help! My Daughter Is Pregnant! – Part 1”

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How To Deal Upon Discovering That Your Child Is Sexually Active

First of all, do not panic when you find out that your teen is having sex. You must not allow any feelings of worry or even anger control your reactions. Your child must feel safe talking to you and come to you for advice and support.

According to Sam Louie, MA, LMHC, “What parents need to remember is that, first, it is normal for children to have sexual behaviors and related questions, as sexual development begins in infancy. As toddlers, they begin to articulate their curiosity with questions and behaviors related to their bodies, gender differences, and sexual functioning.”

Continue reading “My Teenager Is Sexually Active!!! What To Do???”

When parents are asked before getting an ultrasound about what gender they wish their baby has, many people hope that their first baby is a girl. In the fathers’ minds, it means having a little princess at home to cherish. For the mothers, it gives them a cute little thing to put on different dresses. Nevertheless, when they get what they wish for, the typical source of stress for the entire family that makes them want to see a therapist sometimes (true story) is the hair.

You see, some kids are born with super fine hair that looks perfect even when you only place a little bow or headband on it. Other girls, however, come with a shock of hair that is a struggle to style, comb, or wash. The dads do not usually have to deal with such an issue, but most mothers do. So, here are seven hair hacks for every practical mom out there.

Sanitize The Hairbrush

The first thing to do before your morning starts is to make sure that you have a clean hairbrush. Meaning to say, there are no strands or grime stuck in between the bristles that can get in the way or ruin the newly washed hair of your daughter while brushing their hair. If you find any, you can easily remove the fallen hair with toothpicks or Q-tips and wash it thoroughly with soap and warm water so that the grime sticking to it can go down the drain.

Get A Shirt Instead Of A Towel To Dry The Hair

When drying off the hair after a shower, it is better to use a shirt than a towel. The reason is that the latter has more defined threads than the former; that’s why it can have harsher effects on the hair. Hence, you should utilize a shirt or any fabric that’s similar to it when squeezing excess water out of your locks.

Apply Coconut Oil As A Hair Mask

Coconut oil is such a good natural product, in the sense that you and your child can both use it as a hair mask. This substance can moisturize your mane and protect it from damages. It can also soften your daughter’s thick mane, which may be prone to tangles all the time. Feel free to apply the oil before shampooing and leave it on for 20 minutes for best results.

Snip Damaged Ends At Home

Seeing damaged ends is inevitable, primarily if you are always under the sun. Little girls tend to deal with this hair problem as well since they tend to play a lot outdoors during the daytime. To make sure that the damage will not move up the affected strands, though, you can snip them off on your own. Just twist chunks of the hair vertically so that it will be easier for you to see the ones with the split ends.

Make Hairbands Out Of Old Stockings

Since stockings are semi-elastic, they are safer to use than the typical hairbands that generate much friction to the hair. All you need to do is cut an old pair in bits to produce many hair ties. You can use them on your kids, too, and no one will be able to tell the difference.

Use Wet Wipes To Tame Hair

It cannot be helped if there are pieces of hair sticking out of your daughter’s head. That is especially true if she is still quite young and has baby hairs in place. In case that bothers you when you are trying to braid her locks or put it in a tight bun for ballet practice, you may place a wet wipe over the hairbrush and run through the hair. It allows you to tame the unruly strands as you work.

Add Hairspray Indirectly

Considering you are not a fan of hairspray but your daughter’s hair needs to be extremely neat for her dance recital, you should know that you do not have to spray it directly all over her head. Such a process entails that a lot of products will touch her hair, which can damage it later. What you can do instead is spritz the hairspray on the hairpins that you will use. For the rest of the hair, you may spray it on a toothbrush or makeup brush and smooth it over the strands. This way, the harsh chemicals will not touch her scalp.

Final Thoughts

Fixing your daughter’s hair is one of your duties as a parent. It may not always be easy – sometimes you may wish of chopping everything and turning it into a short bob to solve your dilemma – but I know that you know how cute little girls are with their long locks. So, try to follow the hacks mentioned above instead in hopes of easing your issues every morning.

Cheers!

Opening up to your loved ones can be scary, especially when it comes to a serious topic like mental health. According to psychology, most kids are afraid to even acknowledge it in themselves because of the stigma in their own home; that feeling sad or anxious is a “common thing” and that you should ignore it. It’s important to let them feel comfortable in telling you exactly how they think, that what they’re feeling is valid and you are the right person to talk to. Psychology suggests that many children or teens are afraid of telling their parents, in fear of upsetting them or being shut down completely.

“Stigma manifests as misguided stereotypes and negative attitudes or beliefs towards those with mental illness,” says Richa Bhatia, MD, FAPA. “Research shows that stigma and embarrassment were the top reasons why people with mental illness did not engage in medication adherence, such as self-care, therapy and medication compliance.”

According to most experts in BetterHelp, it’s essential to make your child feel that rather than you being upset, you are happy they chose to confide in you. Making them feel like you are always ready to help them in every way possible is the key to getting them to tell you how they’re feeling. To be prepared if ever you think your child is struggling with something, here are some instances or thoughts that may be going through your child’s head.

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“My family won’t believe me or take me seriously.”

Never dismiss or invalidate how your child is feeling, especially when they do choose to tell you when something is wrong. It’s fundamental to know that if your child is already hurting; dismissing their issues may make the experience more painful. Unfortunately, it will slow down his emotional and mental growth. Always let your children explain everything thoroughly for you to understand what they need fully. Also, letting go of any negative preconceived notions about getting professional help will be a good idea, because if your child says they want to seek advice, it’s best to assume they need it.

“I don’t want my family to worry about me.”

Though all families may go through different problems that occur in and out of the home, make sure to prioritize the issues of your children still, may it be big or small. If it is troubling them or if they open up to you about it, it must be worth listening to. It always should be.

“I don’t know or I’m afraid of how my family will react.”

Our children may still be hesitant to talk to you, but once you notice that something is troubling them, you must open up the topic to them, or at least make them feel that they can address things; the sooner, the better. If they’re hesitant, you can opt for them to talk to one person/parent at a time. Make your children feel like they can reach out to you may it be through letters, text messages, or subtle conversations from time to time.

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To be more prepared in case you feel like your children suffer from mental health issues, the following are signs and symptoms of common mental health illnesses in children:

Depression In Children

• Continuous feelings of sadness
• Sudden changes in appetite (increase or decrease)
• Changes in sleeping pattern
• Fatigue and low energy
• Difficulty concentrating
• Feeling worthless or guilty
• Thoughts of Death
• Feeling angry or irritable
• Isolating one’s self from social circles/family

Depression in children often isn’t treated because it’s brushed off or seen as regular emotional and mental changes. Earlier medical studies showed children could also show sign of depression by acting out through angry behavior. Depression is relatively rare under the age of 12 and more frequent from ages 12 and above. It is more common in boys under the age of 10, and for girls, it’s more common around the age of 16.

According to Ajay K Thapar, PhD and co-authors, “much research has been done into the association between depression and environmental factors such as exposures to acute stressful events (e.g., personal injury, bereavement) and chronic adversity (eg, maltreatment, family discord, bullying by peers, poverty, physical illness).” They also added that “stressful life events seem more strongly associated with first onset rather than recurrence of depression,  and risk is considerably greater in girls, and in adolescents who have multiple negative life events than those exposed to one event.”

Anxiety In Children

• Insomnia
• Nightmares
• Improper eating patterns
• Becoming immediately angry
• Uncontrollable outbursts
• Constant worry and negative thoughts
• Feeling tense or using the toilet frequently
• Frequently sobbing/crying
• Clinging to loved ones all of a sudden
• Stomach aches/ nausea

There are different types of anxiety; separation anxiety is common in young children, while older children and teenagers usually have social anxiety.

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According to Jeanne Segal, Ph.D And c-author, “even if [isolation is] the last thing you want to do, try to force yourself to stay social. As you get out into the world and connect with others, you’ll likely find yourself starting to feel better.

Though it really may be difficult to get your children to open up to you about such things, it’s best to let them come to you. When you think something is troubling them, but you don’t want to pry immediately, try to do smaller things and gestures that show them you’re always there when they’re ready. It’s good to let them know that you’ll believe them, you want to know more, and you will do everything to help them. Mental health shouldn’t be a myth or joke in any household; many parents realize this too late in their children’s lives because they never acknowledged or thought of the possibility. Your children’s emotions are always valid. So take the time to consider their mental needs.

One of the most difficult challenges that moms undergo is keeping up with their children’s overall well-being. More often than not, it is the mother’s traditional role to physically look after her children even if she is a working mom. Nowadays, the physical aspect of a child’s well-being is not the only thing parents, especially the moms, should be worried about. Behavioral health’s challenges are now a big thing. Continue reading “Helping Your Kids With Behavioral Health’s Challenges”

The family is an essential thing in the world. They are the ones who teach you a lot of stuff particularly on early development. Each one of them contributes to the growth of your emotional, spiritual, and mental health. However, not all family members are capable of providing you a good source of improvement. You need to understand that some of them can become the cause of your emotional and mental dilemma. In that sense, you need to find the courage to push them away from you. Here are the reasons why it is entirely okay to cut family members out of your life.

Affecting Other Areas Of Your Life

According to some topics at BetterHelp.com, when a toxic family connection affects other essential areas of your life such as work and home, it is the time to cut them off. The stress these people bring will not stop but rather grow to a more undesirable discussion and confrontation. It is important to recognize that to be able to protect the majority of your family, you have to allow each member to grow. With that, you need to separate those functioning ones to those who contribute negatively. Always take in mind that a family member should give each other motivation and help everyone in their circle to strive in their overall development. Therefore, a relationship that hinders this growth should be addressed immediately.

Giving A Negative Feeling

Don’t be afraid to get rid of people who always make you or other members of the family feel uncomfortable. It is your overall well-being that is on the line. Thus, if those particular persons regularly make the whole home environment feel heavy and unpleasant, it’s time to let them go. That’s because of the negative impact they might bring. These toxic individuals are capable of affecting and damaging other relationships, so there’s no sense of keeping them near you or your family. Because if you don’t cut them out and you choose to let them stay around, it can eventually make you negative as well. These people can potentially drain all of the positivity you have in your life. So before thinking of keeping all your family members intact, always consider if all the relationships are worth it. If the connection is harmful to the overall growth of your family, don’t be afraid to consider stepping back. Dr. Patricia Turner, M.D., says that “attempting to maintain every relationship is not desirable or healthy and it is important to know when it is time to quit.”

Damaging Your Health

Keeping an ongoing connection with toxic family members is undoubtedly detrimental to your health. That’s due to the stress and pressure they give to you and the other members of the unit. In the worst cases, these people can cause severe mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression. Aside from that, their presence will automatically bring emotional instability which will also affect your cognitive and physiological function. Sometimes they bring issues inside the home that you and other members won’t be able to mentally and emotionally handle, which in the end will result to sleep disorders and lower self-esteem.

Getting A One-Sided Relationship

No relationship should stay one-sided, and it should always have to be a give-and-take process. So when it does focus on a particular person, shut them out automatically. It is the kind of relationship that you should pick up on sooner rather than later. If the family connection is always about these toxic persons, it’s time to disregard their presence. You need to consider the red flags especially when it is evident that these individuals only care about their well-being. Heir selfishness can entirely create a negative impact on the way you think about yourself. These family members love taking but find it hard to give something in return. You should know better that it is an action that is far more damaging.

It’s Becoming Abusive

When a family relationship starts to become abusive, that’s where you need to get these people out for good. Whether the abuse is sexual, physical, mental, or emotional, it’s time to be firm in shutting these people out in your life. “We have every right to protect ourselves from those who manipulate and emotionally abuse us.” reminds Sherrie Campbell, Ph.D. “We must understand that our toxic family members have simply walked us to the door we’re now choosing to shut.” Always remember that no healthy relationship ends up with abuse. So before anything gets worst, save yourself and the rest of your family from the harshness of emotional and mental torture.

Yes, the process of cutting off family members is not that easy. But keeping yourself and the rest of your family away from toxicity is a significant move in sustaining better overall health. Sharon Martin, LCSW agrees, “Remaining in a relationship with a toxic person is potentially harmful to your emotional and physical health and relationships.” Remember to establish boundaries at all cost.

 

We meet and get acquainted with various types of people every day, but connecting with them is not that easy. We just want to be with our family and other loved ones with whom we are already comfortable with. It seems that we don’t have much time to get to know someone well, or some might not want to get close or intimate because they are afraid of being neglected or judged.

Continue reading “Why It’s Great To Cook And Eat Together”

 

 

 

Meeting people from all walks of life allowed me to see that the principles a person learns from childhood have a huge influence on their behavior as an adult.

For instance, if the kid grew up hearing from the people around them that it’s easy to make money by deceiving others, they may take that to heart and end up with a criminal record. In case he or she only learned to procrastinate, that child would most likely turn into a lazy, unproductive individual.

It’s an exaggeration to link it to the proverbial apple that never falls too far from the tree. The problem is that the kids in the above examples didn’t know the value of responsibility; that’s why it’s hard for them to stay accountable for something significant like their job or life. “The best type of parenting is fair, flexible, respectful, and has learning—rather than submission—as its goal.” says Melanie Greenberg Ph.D.

To keep your offspring from having the same fate, find out how a child can get the hang of being responsible.

 

Help Them Realize There’s No Other Way Around It

The first thing that kids should grasp is that they will have a lot of obligations in this lifetime. Whether the duty is for their family, business, or country, they need to prepare for it sooner than later. Hence, it’s pointless to whine whenever you ask them to fix their bed or clean after themselves. Jim Taylor Ph.D. notes that, “There should also be consequences for not fulfilling responsibilities. The best consequences are those that remove something of importance to your children and give them the control to get it back by acting appropriately.”

 

Increase Responsibilities Little By Little

Though the goal is to teach accountability to your child, you have to delegate a task to him or her that’s age-appropriate. Say, you got a toddler. At this point, he or she can merely put the toys back on the shelves or throw their used nappy in the trash. You may give the kid bigger chores as they mature.

 

Avoid Losing Your Cool

It seems to be in children’s nature to either follow your orders sloppily or not take your words seriously. Despite that, you should try your best not to cry out in frustration. Practice can make their actions more fluid, after all, so let them continue with the task until they feel accustomed to it.

 

Allow The Child To Fulfill Tasks On Their Own

Kids, of course, have no idea of how to accomplish chores at the beginning. Thus, you may show them the proper way of doing it a couple of times. But what you shouldn’t ever do is breathing down their necks each time they’re on to something. According to Perri Klass, M.D. and co-author, “Calibrate your expectations about what your child is capable of doing independently. If you trusted your babies enough to distribute an errand to them, trust them more to complete their tasks without your help. ”

 

Throw In Compliments Here And There

Everyone performs better when a mentor praises them. You are your child’s guide on his or her journey to learning the value of responsibility; that’s why you can’t forget to offer some encouragement, especially once they earn it. Simple statements such as “You’re doing great!” or “Thank you!” can boost their energy.

 

 

Do What You Teach

In the end, the children need to see that you’re not just making them clean their room or wash the plates because you primarily wish to lessen your work. The thought isn’t bad, for sure, yet your objective is to become the role model of being responsible in their eyes. So, ascertain that you’re finishing all your duties at home like them.